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His Only?

December 18, 2011 @ (If only I knew..)

Tags: two years, serious, love, hurt, miss him, want him back, heartbreak, pure, happy, how

I don't want this to sound like another bad romance or break up.. Because we weren't. I know this is hard to believe but in eighth grade, I met the love of my life. Don't get me wrong, I was really young and naive. But he had me at hello. He was tender but strong, charming but sweet, and fun ut committed. He was perfect for me. My other half has finally connected with my soul. We dated seriously for 2 years. We never rushed anything, always a casual move or a serious discussion. We realized the dangers of becoming as close as we did but were so sure we would be together for years to come. He loved me enough to even sit through New Moon with me on our year anniversary. I guess I was never a great girlfriend to him but I couldn't, and still can't live a day without him. A week after our two years, we got into a fight and my friend got involved and made him want to break up with me.. We were done at that point.. We disconnected and lost each other. Tragically, I grieved for months about losing him. He was my gift and I let it go. He moved,literally, across the country and it's been 8 months since I've seen or heard from him. Recently, he popped up into my Facebook and we started talking. I realized about 3 weeks ago how much I missed him and how much I want him back.. He is still kind of bitter, but is sincere too. I'm not sure what I should do anymore about this and was seeking help and guidance from someone who has gone through something like this. I know we both messed up but I still love him dearly. And I don't want to sound like a hopeless romantic because I'm not. I gave myself to him and have lost it. He means the world to me... Still.. Thank you for reading my reach out..

Poor Guy

December 01, 2011 @ (India)

Tags: long distance, long relation

I ended my 7 year long relation few days back.It started when I was 16. A high school romance...butterflies in the stomach and stuff...We went to college to different cities but it kept on. She was in a girl's college with no guys around. She used to come to meet me sometimes but meetings were rare and it took months for us to meet. We kept together by phone and occassional meetings. I was too emotionally attached to her and felt the same for her as well. Years passed, I thought our love grew stronger. We were different people. I was very ambitious and a little introvert. She was a complete extrovert, liked attention and was not much into career. During college I found a few girls who I thought were more mature than she was but I loved her for what she was, never ever thought of snapping it...Over the years I created an illusion(atleast now I feel so) that she was the one and we are together for eternity. I faced some really difficult time in 2010 and she was rock solid by my side.My love and respect grew for her. I reciprocated in the same way. Being by her side everytime. She said she respected me for that. Finally we got a job in the same city and after 4 long years we were together again. Could meet. I felt complete. I thought our relation was evolving. I got more serious. Told my family. She did the same.(not Mom and dad, but others).I was very happy with her. I felt she was happy with me as well. In july, I got busy with an office assignment, she said she was busy as well.I did not care as I trusted her. In october I was out of the country for work. We were talking still.Perfectly fine. No issues. I came back in November. It was her birthday on 6th. I wanted to be with her 24x7 and told her so. She agreed. But on 4th, she called me and said she wanted to party with friends. After some discussion and my failed attempts to change her mind, it was agreed that she would party with her friends. I was sad. But still wanted to be with her. On her Bday night, I found her lying to me about a guy's call the other night.He was an office colleague whom she knew for 6 months.Trvial issue I thought, we discussed and she said she shouldn't have lied, apologised. I was happy. But to my surprise I caught her lying again. Same day. I was angry. We talked and she confessed that she kissed that guy on her bday. She told it to be an impulsive one and only a one time thing..I asked her to choose between the guy and me. To my freaking surprise she said she is having a strong feeling towards him. I was miserable. I somehow persuaded her to meet me and not think of snapping a 7 year relation just like that. We met the next day, talked.I was so scared that night that I slept holding her hand and kept murmuring,"Please, dont go, dont go" and she kept telling me she wont. She agreed that she made a mistake and she must stop it. But somehow, she was not happy. After a long discussion the next day, she confessed that her bday was not the first time and she had been cheating on me while I was out of the country in October. I was broken. We used to talk every day then and she had no guilt. Nothing. I asked her to forget him and come back. But she did not. She said she could not stop talking to him.. She gave up a 7 year relation for a guy whom she knows just for 5 months. The guy knew about it all around that she was committed. Yet....I feel horrible right now. All the time I was out, I kept telling people that she's waiting for me to get back..she was even calling me and telling me that she missed me and wanted me back soon. But in reality she was in someone else's arms. I don't know if I would ever be able to forget this. I don't know if I would ever be able to love anyone now..I could not believe it..I mean it was all OK for me till 6th, not even the slightest hint.I was buying stuff for her bday.and on 9th, it was over....I feel broken...and find solace only in alcohol

Anonymous

November 06, 2011 @ (NY)

Tags: Jail bait

My then boyfriend and I had been seriously together for almost 3 years. Everything was just fine. We were planning on moving in together, planning our 3 year anniversary trip to Miami and even, possibly, when the time was right we shared the similar ideas of marriage and starting a family. I basically lived my life for this person. We saw each other every day without fail because we live close together.

Until that fateful day when I received a phone call from him...He calls to tell me the he is in jail and needs $1500 bail money. I tell him that I don't have the kind of money and that he should contact his parents as a last resort. Meanwhile my mind is going crazy & I'm thinking to myself what he could have possibly done to land himself into this kind of predicament.

An hour later his dad gives me call and we both deicide to go to the jail and bail him out. One the way there we talk about all the possibilities of why he could be there. The only thing that could plausibly come across my mind was unpaid tickets in relations to his car. Well we get to jail and since there is only one person allowed in to bail him out, his dad goes in to retrieve him. Mind you we had gotten there at 7 p.m. and didn’t leave until 1 a.m.

When my then boyfriend decides to get into the car he tells me that he would rather talk to me one on one rather than his dad being around. This made me even more upset. I had waited several hours already and now he has the nerve to make me wait even more for an explanation!

So when we finally get to our destination he gives me this bogus story about how he had a relationship with a girl who had lied about her age, before I even came into existence and that she had been stalking him etc. etc. So he lied and said it was basically a case of fatal attraction.

The next day I think to myself “Why the hell would the cops go and pick him up, at his job!, on things that happened years ago?”
So I call his dad, because things just weren’t adding up and he tells me the dreadful news that this incident happened in September of this year! Keep in mind it was the last week of October I find out this news. Adding insult to injury he lied about the whole fatal attraction scenario!!

In actuality, my then boyfriend, who is 22, went on facebook, started communicating and sexting with a girl who he claimed told him she was 17 but she’s really 15. He told me he didn’t even have a facebook when he had one the whole entire relationship. They met up on what he says on one occasion in the parking lot of her school. There this 15 year old girl performs oral sex on him. Somehow, someway her parents find out about this and her dad is a cop. So now he’s is in a lot of trouble and must go to court for Lord knows how long it takes to settle his situation.

So now his face, name, and address is plastered all over the internet for anyone who looks his name up to see. That he sought out sexual relations with an underage girl and got caught!

There were warning signs that we would argue about consistently.
1. He was so defensive about his phone; he always hid it, and would go to the extremes to cover his tracks.
2. Every time he went on the internet he would delete the browsing history.
3. He wanted to get into shape and eat healthy all of a sudden, which was around the time he started talking to this girl.

WOW!! He is a pathological liar and continued to lie to me to keep me!! He didn’t even want me to go to his court date! Had I not found out the truth from his dad! He would have continued to lie to me!

I am a complete mess right now. I’m going through midterms and working. Things have just been absolutely rough! I have even contemplating taking him back. But I know that it is not an option! Even though I’m hurting for the moment, I need to move on with my life and let time be the best remedy.

Manda

June 15, 2011 @ (Indiana)

Tags: crazy, psycho, too long

The weirdest thing about this story is that I never actually DATED N.B. but there was a clear break up!

NB was my best friend. I had gotten to know him though he was shy and withdrawn and he really got close to me. While I did like him it wasn't serious. So one day I pulled him aside and told him (in my memory) as best as I could that I didn't see him that way.

Then I met CL and we dated. It was an open and obvious relationship and we all spent time together at the same youth group, so I assumed NB knew like the rest of the world. Eventually, CL and I broke it off and I told NB that we had broken up. He acted as though he never knew we were dating and asked when he and I would start dating. This was a YEAR after the first conversation about all of this.
My response was pretty much "what? no."

Then the crazy set in. He bought a trenchcoat (like a friggin' high school shooter). He stopped bathing. He combed his hair down over his face. I got psycho emails and changed phones with my mom. My parents were looking into a restraining order.

So then I go to college. He keeps it up and finally says via email if I never respond to him he will leave me alone. If only! I don't respond and when I visit home he corners me. He says he just wants to be friends and I shout at him that I don't.

Sounds easy enough? Even during my 3 year engagement he would circle me at church, regardless of my fiance being there or not!

So a long and torturous break up with someone I never dated!

DJ

April 13, 2011 @ (U.S.)

Tags: broken up heart

So here's my story:

I'm 17, just your average guy, I play a lot of sports, have a job... my girlfriend of almost a year dumped me 2 months ago. I met her over 3 years ago at a youth group. We were close friends for 2 years before we started dating. Last February we started hanging out a lot. By the time Summer started we were head over heals in love with each other. I guess I was kind of the "bad boy" we snuck out all Summer long and I disrespected her grandfather whom she was living with at the time. In August he kicked her out of his house and she was forced to move in with her alcoholic/abusive mother who is the only other person she had to live with. She doesn't have any other family and her entire family has a whole lot of problems. She also has a past of a lot of abuse in her history as I found out eventually. As for me, I also do not have any family or relatives. I live alone with my single mother and my younger siblings. My family has just as many problems as hers does. My mother is really the only person I have, however, we are not that close. My ex-girlfriend goes to a different high school then me and as we went through the school year her life became very challenging at home. We stayed together though. I was there for her through it all time-and-time again. I even got my ma to let her live with us for a while to be away from her life at home. In my heart she became the love of my life. We had so much in common in our pasts. The same goals for our futures. We could understand each others pain like no one ever could. I loved her with all my heart for near 10 months

Anyways we started fighting because of her own problems at home. This went on all the way through December and January. I tried to be supportive of her problems, but she started pushing me away, more so every couple weeks. In February, after I hadn't seen her in 3 whole weeks (which she filled with excuses, and insincere reasons why she couldn't see me) she called me and broke up with me on the phone. I asked if I could at least see her one more time. She refused. I asked her why it had come to this and her reasons were things such as she wanted to be independent, she did't wanna be in a relationship anymore, she didn't feel like we should take relationships so seriously at this time in our life, blah blah blah. So after hours of tears on my part I let her go. If this is what she wanted, then I wanted her to just be happy. Anyways, I had been the only one really holding the relationship together for 3 months and I couldn't take it anymore. I never texted her or called her once after we broke up on the stupid phone that night.

Two weeks later after a lot of pain and hurt, I was at a party with some buddies. I asked a mutual friend who I saw there how she was doing to find out that she had been cheating on me with some fuckin douche bag who's six foot-seven, plays basketball, drives a 2010 mustang, is rich, and apparently is a big player at her school. This hurt so much that I ended up getting in a fight with another guy at the party. I couldn't sleep for days, and still have a lot of trouble sleeping. I wanted really bad to go find this guy she'd been cheating on me with. Luckily I didn't. Now I'm sitting here a month later still heartbroken. She has made me hate my life, and according to people she's having a great time with this other guy. I've gone out with 2 girls since we broke and neither one of them has meant anything to me. As of right now I hate my life, I hate her, and I wish she was NEVER ever a part of my life.

That's basically my story. Enough said.

Danielle

March 31, 2011 @ (Chicago)

Tags: breakup, first, relationship, heartbroken

My boyfriend and I were together for just over two years. It was the first serious relationship either of us had been in, and we were in love. He fought hard to win me over, and he made me feel more special than I have ever felt in my life. He was my world. I trusted him completely and never in my wildest dreams imagined that he could break my heart.

During the last few months of our relationship, I felt a subtle shift. It was nothing to raise any alarms, but I definitely noticed it. I realized that I was usually the one to initiate affection, or to plan an outing, or even to call. He was still kind and loving, but it felt as though his passion had faded.

I confronted him about it. I asked him if he was still in love with me. The moment I said it, I regretted it. He suddenly looked very confused, and the second he began talking I knew I had opened Pandora's Box. With a pained look in his eyes, he told me he wasn't sure anymore -- that our relationship had become "comfortable." He said he needed time to think.

After a week without contact, he he came over to my apartment. I felt optimistic; I was convinced that we would just end up having a serious talk addressing the inevitable loss of the puppy love stage in our relationship. I was wrong. He told me that he was no longer in love with me, that he no longer wanted to be my boyfriend, but he couldn't imagine losing me as a friend. In that moment I felt my world collapse. I pleaded with him to reconsider, I begged him to stay. Nothing I said had any effect, and he left my place in tears.

It's been six months since I've seen him, and my heart is still in pieces. Our parting was so sudden, I still feel like I'm in shock. After a few months of trying to remain his friend, I quit. The pain of being platonic was too great for me, and my pain was too great for him. Now I'm too scared to reach out to him again for fear of the pain that comes with knowing you've been replaced. All I want is to be back in his arms, but he's let me go and hasn't looked back.

Kiana Boxdale

March 21, 2011 @ (Ohio)

Tags: breakup

So we had Carrer Day at my school , I wasnt all too excited except for the fact that i got out of class for a whole day . We had Seniors who were our leaders and they helped show us all of the programs in our school . One kid stuck out to me, he was gorgeous , i have never seen him before in all my two years in the highschool . He showed me around , along with the other hundred kids, what are the odds he ends up talking to me ? Slim but possible, because we ended up talking to each other. It was slow at first, just texting , then hanging out . He was shy, i was shocked, a sexy senior who's shy ? Well , things picked up and we started spending almost everyday together. We would sleep together, no not sex, just falling asleep together and i never felt so right in his arms all through the night. It got serious, we told each other we wouldnt know what to do without each other..then he changed. Turns out he wasn't so shy, he starting turning into a jerk and ditching me, we went from texting all day non-stop to not texting at all. I was crushed, but i held on because losing him would be like taking my heart out and throwing it into an ocean . I held on , my grip slipped, and now he's gone. He didn't tell me why, just walked out . I thought atleast i deserve a reason, but i guess i don't. Turns out he's talking to someone else, doesn't text me back anymore and i'm heart broken. I loved him, when he was mean i would just kiss him, when he would make mistakes i would forgive, i was always there for him . When i do everythign for him thought ; he does nothing for me but leave me behind like a bad habbit .. Being left behind , is the worst pain ever immaginable .

Jessica

March 12, 2011 @ (Minnesota)

Tags: love, detachment

We were old school friends and had been, in those days, pretty close. Not long after I got out of my last relationship, he called me up out of the blue (we had kind of drifted apart) and asked me out. I had had the biggest crush on him when we went to school, so I agreed.

We had an amazing couple of months together. I had never been so in love with anyone I had ever dated. Then we had our first fight. It was a blur of misunderstandings, harsh words, and lots of emotion. We didn't talk for a few days.

It took all I had not to get emotional when I saw him again, but I knew if I did, he'd get defensive and things would just get worse. After we talked everything over (and we both apologized) I felt great. He told me he loved me and that I was the first girlfriend he'd had in quite a while that he felt semi-serious about. I felt closer to him than I ever had.

But then, he proceeded to spew some crap about how he'd been detaching himself from me and how he didn't think the relationship could work out because of it. Apparently, this so-called "love" he felt for me could be disregarded over our FIRST fight. He may as well of just ripped my heart out of my chest and stomped on it.

I broke up with him. How was I supposed to be with someone who could detach himself from me over one fight that I apologized for over and over again?

But then I felt bad. I loved him so much- what kind of person would I be if I didn't try again? I texted him, begging him to talk to me. Begging him to tell me why he didn't love me enough to get over this fight. Begging him to tell me why this wouldn't work out if it had been going so well up to that point. I don't beg- ever. His response? "I don't feel like talking right now- sorry." No matter how much I begged him to talk because I needed him to, he wouldn't.

So I said goodbye. Guys- if you don't really care, don't tell a girl she means the world to you and that you love her. Apparently, for my guy, I shattered his perfect image of me by actually having feelings and by being hurt by our fight. Terrible, I know.

Tim

February 01, 2011 @ (Australia)

Tags: recent, breakup, harsh

this is long SO, im 21 and a girl ive been with for 18months, shes 18. but ive known her for about over 3 years now we met online and immediately connected and liked her i couldnt stop thinking about her even when she stopped talking for a year and got a bf i also had gotten a gf but after all that somehow perfect timing got us to start talking again when we were both recently single and after a few months i fell even harder and we decided to be in a relationship.

anyway she recently came up to stay for new years eve cause she knew itd mean alot to me, a couple days before new years she decided that Me asking her why she wasnt saying much and just moping around was a good reason for her to decide to leave and rip up some heartfelt things i gave her infront of me and say were over as soon as she gets back home etc. but during the days between then and when she actually left 1day before new years, she said she loved me and held, kissed me we had sex etc. but when she got back she blockd all communications with me so about a week after unanswered txts i added her best friend of 7 years to suss something out cause they havent been friends since a few month ago, i immediately found out that its because My ex was talking to and seeing a guy her ''friend'' was hooking up with behind her back, which was also behind my back. and they are already in a relationship and all that shit so she had been lying to me and cheating for a good few weeks i'd say. we promised eachother from the start even though she lived in another state it wouldnt just be another fuck around and the feelings were real and i would just move there anyway we only saw eachother a few times in person but i was still happy loving her and was serious even if it was hard sometimes i just thought that it'd make it all the more better when we were finally together all the time and i was nearly about to make that happen before she did this. she tried blaming her friend for pushing those 2 closer together becoz her friend pissed him off when she was screwing with his head but thats no excuse to go and start fucking him and dating him she should have stopped talking to him when her friend did. people will tell me too bad and that it was the distance thats a problem but i dont think that makes a difference after 18months ive been really hurt before but this managed to top everything else cause im just so sure about this girl and couldnt have feelings for someone else if i tried i cant move on, if you knew half of the things shes said and promised to me and made me youd be just as shocked as i am for what shes done. i dont know how someone can just erase that amount of time with someone they said theyd be with no matter what just like that asif i was nothing and i had never and would never cheat on her. i have to cry myself to sleep and im sick of it and im stupid enough to hope she'll come back like she did before because i have theories that the guy only did it becoz he wanted to piss her friend off for fucking around with him but if they bould BOTH do that to me n her friend then they must be perfect for eachother in a screwed up way and im guessing it will fuck up soon and she'll be alone and regret it because i know he can't love her atleast not like I do if i'm still dumb enough to want her even after what she's done cause i feel empty im used to having txts and msgs etc. from her every morning day & night and it just kills me to have those images of them in my head i can never get over it so all i'm gonna do is wait until she stops ignoring me.

Brandee

December 27, 2010 @ (Boulder City Nevada)

Tags: Cameron Cuny

Let's see. It's December... 6months ago.

I was dating this doucher, and I met someone online.He was, perfect? No, perfect is an under-state-ment. Anywys, we fell in love. We both did, instantly.

God, I'm getting flash backs; we celebrated Fourth of July together. July 3rd we met and fell inlove, and became the greatest relationship ever. Hours and Hours on the phone, everynight. Webcams, phones, Im's. But, everyone was right.. Long distance doesn't work.

Anyways... We were amazing, but we only lasted a short time. I remember the breakup so vividly. I was high off of life, hanging out with my best friend, walking home, and as I passed the alleyway across the way from my alley, I got a phone call from my baby. I remember him talking to his buddy breifly, and then getting serious. He just explained to me that it wasn't working. He then asked, if I was alright, and with tears in my eyes, I replied yes. He told me if I needed to cry I could.

Oh I needed to cry alright. But I told him I didn't want him to have to hear it for, I didn't want him to feel bad. I told him I had to go...

My friend Devin was concerned.

I turned around, facing away from her, and cried, silent at first.

I tried to walk, i was so shaken, I couldn't walk, so I stumbled and fell. I sat against the wall, and Devin rushed over. I just started to scream. I couldn't breath, and I was screaming. Devin helped me up while I was still bawling, and she hugged me. I was so crushed. It felt as if he took a kife, rammed it into my heart, and then twisted the blade. After about an hour, I regained enough of my composure to get home..
As sooon as I was in my room, I began to cry again. I turned up my music and cried. After like... roughly 3 hours, Devin went home. I never stopped crying.

I did something I have never done before too.
I became numb. I was in such denial. It was so not over.

I couldn't even feel my heartbeat anymore, and pathetically, I cut myslef. I didn't want to die, I was making sure I was still alive.

He called me. I swear, I just sat there, with the phone muted, crying, screaming, not breathing. he was apologizing. Which broke my heart even more, causing me more pain.

This was the first guy, the first person I have ever felt love for, and he does this too mee? I would tell everyone exactly why he broke up with me, stupid reson, but I don't want to be mean. Why would anyone do this to me? My first real true heart break.. and it still haunts me. 6 MONTHS LATER! Why?

I have cried so many times, just at random, and if any of my friends even say his name, itnsta-cry. Little things remind me of him. Especially the song, It's Not Over- Second HandSerenade. I have listened to it atleast 100 times in the last couple hours. It's 3:46 in the morning.. I have officially been crying for 3 hours. Yay. what an accomplishment. Are you happy Cameron? Knowing that the fucking thought of you makes me cry. And when i do cry, I can't breath. I put myself through hell, for you. And what's even worse... I still love you.

-Brandee.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wZmvJknzLfU&feature=related