Searching for "scared"

49 Results For 'scared'

Ryan

April 16, 2015 @ (United States)

Exactly a year ago I met someone special, the moment I set my eyes on her I knew she was something of one of a kind, I was a typical high school student and she was as well. It took me a month before I worked the courage to speak to her and my gut was right, she was the most beautiful person I have ever met. She was weird and quirky and funny and stupidly silly. The school year ended and thats when it started to get serious. We spent our summer together and did many things, she taught me how to swim(because I never trusted anyone around water due to my hydrophobia) and we went on vacation together(her parents payed for my trip lol) It was honestly one of the happiest times of my life. We barely fought and if we did we made up each time like it was nothing and moved on with our days. I grew blinded by my affection soon after, I loved this girl and I was terrified to admit it. Soon after the next school year started, I could feel the distance happening. Which caused me to become jealous, scared, etc I was panicking and didn't know what to do. I could see it coming and it did. She broke up with me, telling me she didn't want a relationship right now blah blah blah. I crashed and burned, I was so devastated that I just wanted to hurt myself(of course I didn't) she then led me on for a few months, would kiss me, try and comfort me when I was down, she even came over to my house and slept with me, but in the end she would always use that excuse and it pushed me even further down... causing me to push her even further away without realizing it... Ever sense then I've just been realizing what I did wrong and been bettering myself, dating new people most guys would say my life has been pretty great for some of the girls that are chasing me.. but all I can continue to think about is her. The one that got away. That all I can do is pray because I knew her reason of leaving me was complete crap, especially since she's with someone else now. I just wish her the best while I sit and wish I had the best. She's still deep in my heart and I see people hating on their ex and everything, but even though she did me wrong I can't help but wish she has the best for her. I just know that if I was with her now, things would have been much different and she'd still be mine, but that's my new found confidence that I will hope to be able to use with someone of the same or better amount to offer... I've learned a lot and even though I still am upset about her, maybe we're better off. Or maybe it was the bad timing, I'm now 18 and i'm still young. Life ahead of me is something to shine about.

AZ

April 11, 2015 @ (United States)

Tags: first Love, First break up, second chance, back together

My story might be a little different, but still the same feelings, the same pain. I am a guy and i fell in love with another guy this was my first relationship with a guy. We met in March of 2014 everything was great from day one. We met at a parking lot at the willowbrook mall in Houston, TX. We were great together, we wouldn't go 24hrs without texting each other. He told me from the begining he was scared of getting hurt and wanted to take everything slow, he said he had moved too fast before and only ended up getting hurt. He didnt want to make the same mistake this time. We never became an official couple, but we were officially dating. He told me what he was feeling was getting stronger and it was freaking him and he didnt want to lose me. We went on a few road trips, Marfa, TX Austin, San Antonio it was great. We used to see each other a few times per week almost a year later we started seeing each other less and less, he put this big distance between us i didnt know why and it was killing me. In October I decided to ask him to take it to the next step, he straight out said no, he didnt want to get hurt or move to fast. I told him i would wait for him. We kept hanging out, things were ok I was already in love, but i was also scared. so in March i finally decided to put the fear aside and tell him i fell in love with him and that i love him so at least he knew how i feel, i didnt want to pressure him. When i told him he probably freaked out, he was more quite than usual. I started feeling sad, i didnt want to lose him. I told him to tell me if he wasnt interested anymore or didnt want to continue dating. He said he was just figuring out himself. On March 18th saw him again and it was the last time i saw him, i texted him he didnt reply at that moment i thought he was ignoring me, avoiding me, he texted me back he said he wasnt. I felt he didnt want to talk to me or hang out anymore it was killing me i didnt know if i did anything wrong, he told me there was not a thing wrong with me that it was all him and he wasnt ready. i told him i had faith we will end up together i had hope he would shop up at my door and tell me he wanted to give it a chance. He said maybe someday, he wasnt ready yet, but he wasnt going to disappear or quit talking to me. That was his last text. He completely ignored me, I didnt know why, i didnt know what happened or what i did wrong. I still havent gotten a text from him. I did everything i could to be together. This is the first time I was in a relationship with a guy, I never thought i could love someone, i never thought i could love a guy this much. I accepted all these feelings, I was ready to tell my family if i had to. Its almost two weeks since he ignored me, his silence is killing me, he didnt give me the gift of closure. I dont know what hurts more to feel that i lost him, to have accepted all these emotions or to be ignored and i dont know why or what happened or if i didnt anything wrong. This is the first time i feel this, the first time i suffer for someone. This is the first time i love someone and it was a guy. And the worse thing is that i still have hope that he will show up at my door, i hope he is just figuring out himself to finally be ready and start something with me. He will be ready someday, he will give someone a chance, i wish that someone was me, i wish it was me the one to make him happy. I love him, he will always be my white guy, the one who brought light into my life.

Lisa

April 09, 2015 @ (east coast)

Tags: breakup, scared

I thought everything was going fine in our relationship. However, I knew deep down there was an uphill battle because of our circumstances. We were both working full time, going to school and have other activities. However, I had faith in love and our relationship. He did not- he had stopped communicating with me about where he was at. We were supposed to go to several activities on Saturday that he really wanted to do and I as well. I was making a conscious effort be more social with him. He showed up at my house and I immediately knew something was wrong. Even though the night before was fine and 2 nights before he had invited me to go with him to a family event. When he walked through my door he told me he couldn't do it any longer. That there was a block within him and he had been struggling with it for some time. Also, that he didn't want to do a long distance relationship and he would be moving in a few months across the country. I was pretty shocked and cold to him. I was able to kindly express my disbelief and disappointment, but I wished I could have been warmer. I asked him to take his things and to throw mine out. The next day I sent him an email letting him know I was going to give him money for part of the tv he had bought me and sent him a nice note saying goodbye. He had a pretty cold response- which shows really just where he's at. I'm 36 years old and scared of being alone the rest of my life. My faith in real love is wavering and I never thought that would happen to me. Thank you for everyone sharing their stories.

Jay

March 14, 2015 @ (Florida)

Tags: bad breakup

We started dating when I was twelve. March 8, 2013. He was by far the love of my life. In February of 2014, he started cheating and going the wrong ways, but I stayed with him because I loved him. In April, he ended things. His ex girlfriend(they dated during a break) attempted suicide and he got scared, so he decided to start a relationship with her. He was my everything, the love of my life, perhaps my soulmate, my first kiss, my first love, my first everything. I have been depressed ever since he started cheating, it's currently March, 2015, and I still am so depressed. It's been 328 days since we ended things and I can't stop loving him. I have no idea how a fourteen year old girl is so capable of these feelings. We were best friends. If I don't keep myself occupied I start thinking about him and I eventually get anxious. I've had about four rebounds, one lasted a week, two last three weeks, and one lasted four and a half months..

Nia

February 27, 2015 @ (OC)

Tags: Confused, scared, cheat, best friend, no trust

"Joe" and I were never really together. We never were friends, I just knew he went to my high school. After graduation he added me on Facebook and we started talking. I was really falling for this dude. Joe would call me and text me every morning and throughout the day until I'd finally fall asleep. Slowly he stopped all this. Turns out he had started dating my best friend. Double slap in my face. They were both dating behind my back. I stopped talking to them both. I lost my best friend I'd known for over 12 years and my crush within the same hour. About to months later he comes back. I ignore him but he tried to contact me through every media outlet... Finally I give in and just say hi. He pulls me back in and we begin talking again. Today we're not official but together. Omens are telling me to end it with him, but I don't know how I'd take it not talking to him thoughout the day. It's become a habit to go to his house and hang out. I can't trust him though. After he found out I was talking to someone else, he said he wouldn't be able to trust me. So I wonder what we're both doing together still.... I'm just scared to end things with him for sure. I'm scared to cry. I've been heart broken once and don't want to go through it again, although every time I'm with him my heart dies a little.

Bay

January 22, 2015 @ (Michigan)

Tags: bad breakup breakups sad depressed#miss fat god love sadness cheated cheater cheatedon bae bay babe happy funny guys girls emo scene emo scene hair

July 9, 2013. the best day I've ever lived. I remember it so clearly. the day we met in person. the day we kissed. he was, and still is, the best person I've met. but I've learned a lot about great people since I met him. I learned that no one is all around perfect. he was like.. a sociopath. he always pretended to be completely faithful. I knew so much about him, even though I pretended not to. I knew in my heart that he was a sociopath. I guess I never put the pieces together.
more towards the end of us, I began to be very depressed. he said he just wanted me to be happy. but I think what he really wanted.. was for me to leave him alone. I was scared. I was scared that other girls were better than myself. he knew this about me.
so, we argued very much. one day we argued and he decided to "break up" with me, which was something that started happening recently. we would break up and get back together a few minutes later. this time though, he took it a step further. he talked to a girl that I specifically told him he could not talk to because they used to flirt with each other all the time. well, all I knew was that they had flirted, and I wasn't okay with that. but little did I know.
so, I talked to her. I apologized for being rude to her before because I never knew exactly what happened between the two of them. she told me exactly what happened. she said that he led her on for 3 months, WHILE he was dating me. she didn't know that he was dating me. she said that she gave him a few blow jobs and they went to the movies twice together. she said that she was under the impression that they were together. until one day, he told her that he was using her. he switched schools and stopped talking to her. she thought I knew about that, but I didn't. all I knew was that they spoke over snapchat and they flirted. maybe if I wasn't so oblivious about the whole thing, I would've known. I was just so in love, I guess. it wasn't something I wanted to believe.
so, after she told me this, I realized that I was just lied to for over a year.. by a guy that I thought cared about me. he looked me in my eyes and told me that he kissed 2 girls in his life. he looked me in my eyes and told me nothing happened between them. I should have known. it hurt me for so long just to know that he flirted with her because it was something he didn't even feel guilty about. I don't understand how he could do something like this to me.
and now it feels like I spent a year and seven months of my life on someone who didn't care about me very much. someone who pretended. and every happy memory is just like trash. it's useless to me but it hurts me so bad. everywhere I go, I remember what him

Lonelyperson

October 11, 2014 @ (Malaysia)

Tags: bad break up, sad break up

The second year of school i was scared... to be in a new class. The first year i never have friends i was always alone always getting bullied. the second year im scared it might be worst.. but.. i met a girl who was so kind and caring for me.. 2 months past we cared each other as friends. its time i told her i loved her.. and on the day she accepted it because she was in love with me also. we been through a lot together. we are always together to fix anything together. one day she started to change into a diffrent person. she dont care me like how she use to she dont love me like how she use to. but i told her i will always love her with all my heart and never leave her. she said she wont give up on us and will be forever with me. we promise each other. one day she said maybe we should break up..she said sorry i give up on us.. sorry i break our promise.. that day.. i never believed in forever anymore.. i cried everyday.. and she was so happy without me. she flirts with other boys. then.. we started talking again.. we got back together again.. after a week the last day of school i told her i will make her happy again. that night i said sweet things and told her how beautiful she was. we had a awesome night. then.. we went to bed. tomorrow her mum found out we where dating she couldnt accept it.. and my GF said sorry i have to leave.. but she said why when she was with her ex her mum accepted it... she said maybe because im not chinese.... and she said.. at least we are friends... everything went crashing down. she started being happy again with out me. i started being alone again.. no friends.. nothing.. and she saved me when i was in a dark room.. she light up my room but now she left.. its worst then before.. i tot we could be married... and.. Grow old together... i wanted to call her.. she said maybe tomorrow.. then tomorrow i ask can i call she pretend she didnt hear it.. and we stop talking.... i just needed.. the phone call.. to tell her how much i love her.. before she leave.. but.. i didnt get that call..

Love_love

June 03, 2014 @ (new york)

Tags: bad breakup cheater funny breakup

Ok so this boy lets call him matthew ok so i liked him for about two months and he was ny best friends boy best friends so one day she formally introduced us so he said i was cute then he told her that he really liked me and then from there he picked me up from school and he would hug me and then we were best friends then i guess she told him that i was going to ask him out so i when to the store and he came with me he was just keeped huging me and he was being nice so jhe he told the store dude that i was really cute and that i was his girl and my face turned red so did his and we was walking and he said that if i was going to asked him something i said no then he said i already know what oit is and i was so scared like my stomach keeped having butterflies and i said i cant do it then he said ok will you go out with i said yeah!then he said just yeah then i said i mean yes he just started laughing and he walked me home he said bye babe i said bye<3 then the next day he came with ne to pick up my brother and sister from school and he hugged me and grabbed me and gave nme a tight hug and then he kissed me on my cheak and on Friday my aunt was baby sitting us and she said i can go see him i said thanks so much love you and then u when over to my friends house and she took me out side we when alot of places so after he came and he wasnt talking to me and he he said cece sat on my lap and fell asleep on me btw(cece is my best friends name) i was like what why then i said iyts ok and they were like brother and sister after that he inboxed me and said its over then i said its ok but why not tell me in person don't be less of a man and tell me over facebook. he said that he didn't want to see me cry i said im not crying and then we just stopped fighting i said can we be friends after a week bc it was our one month anniversary and he was yeah i would like that so we stared being friends but then my other best friend told me that he called me a side hoe and he told everyone that he asked out my other best friends so i asked him he said no and then over spring break he asked me out being the dumbass that i am i said yes this time we made it a whole month and then one day. My guy best friend told me he saw my cece and Matthew making out and holding hands i told him he keeped denying it so be for i could say it was over he told me first so the week after he called me his side hoe and i meant nothing to him so now that im dating this boy he wants to get mad and then he asked out my beast friends both of them and they when out then broke up and then him and my other best friend and him when out he told me the only reason that he is dating her is to get back at me
But now that i found someone new he told nme that he loved me and i told him no so now everyday he rides his bike to my house and saids hi and me being nice a say hi back but i told all of them that karma is a bitch and he ended up in love with me and. Doesn't like anyone eles

Shavel

May 16, 2014 @ (Florida)

Tags: Heartbroken

I've been with this guy name Nicholas for 1 1/2 years. We met in middle school, I didn't really notice him or liked him. It all started our sophomore year of high school. I didn't even know he went to my school but anyways we end up having my favorite subject together. He was just a friend to me, nothing more, nothing less. One day my teacher sat us together and we was watching a movie. I felt this weird feeling towards him that I never felt before. I wanted to hold his hand and touch him. To me he was unattractive. Maybe because I was trying to get back with my ex at the moment and still had feelings for. We both played basketball btw. One day after my basketball game my ex told me he didn't wanna talk to me no more ect. So I decided to call Nicholas because I was lonely and wanted to talk to someone to not think about my ex. I called him and he was at a basketball game watching another school play. He went outside just to talk to me. I started flirting with him without knowing it.
The next morning I went to school and I couldn't believe wat I've did last night. I didn't like him nor wanna talk to him.
It felt so wired in that class and I usually spoke a lot in that class and now I started not to.
2 months passed by and he wanted to go out with me but I would always tell him I'm not ready to date or I'm still hung up on my ex but he still waited for me to be ready.
We talked for 2 months before making it official. He asked me out on January 8 .
I always been bad lucked with guys so this one I was scared to give my all. I wasn't really into it like he was but after a couple months I grew to love him. He was my everything, my best friend, just my world and I was his. Not a day goes by that I didn't get a good morning / goodnight text. He made everyday worth being happy for. He made me realize a lot in myself. We shared everything. I use to give him money and he did the same to me, we use to cook each other lunch, just simply take care of each other. Everyday was a happy day for me and him. But u might be wondering it seems like u guys love each other a lot , y would u guys break up? Well I have a lot of insecurity because of my past relationships, I never thought I was good enough or pretty enough to be his gf. He told me stop thinking like that Cus I'm the only women he sees and loves. I met his family. He showed me off to the world. Say I was his queen ect. He motivated me to do better in the sports I play. We filled out scholarships for each other. Motivated each other in everything we did. He have put up with a lot I've done. He was tierd of me putting ppl in our relationship, assuming he was doing things behind my back( cheating) which he never did nor talk to someone different but I was so insecure. He got fed up and left me and now I've realize what I've lost. I've lost my motivator, best friend, my happiness. I pray everyday we get back together. We've been broken up for a week now and it feels like a year. My room is full of things he bought me. Sometimes he only had enough money for a haircut but he gave me that money so I can eat and he don't get money often. I just wanna show him that my insecurities are gone and my assumption too. Just us breaking up made me realize how much I needed to change but I told him I would always change and I never did but the time I really changed he doesn't believed me because I've said it a bunch of times. I would like for u guys to pray for us to work things out because ever since I lost him, I've lost my happiness, my motivation, and most importantly the love of my life

Lyn

January 23, 2014 @ (New york)

Tags: Bad break up, I still love him, First love

Our relationship was totally unexpected. Last september 2013, a guy that I had a teeny tiny bit of a crush asked me out unexpectedly. No clues, No everything. Out of shock, I started freaking out. I don't know what to do. My mind screamed no, but heart says yes! The reson why i don't want to go on is because im scared of my mom. Like really. She's the definition of a really strict mom. i was scared but then a thought crossed my mind.

Why not accept this? Everything happens for a reason right?

That's when I said Yes. For the first 2 weeks it was amazing. The sparks, the giddy butterflies in my tummy were there until my mom found out about him. It was horrifying. My mom was in range. My mom threatened me to talk to him in school. I was scared. I told her that I promise to break up witj. So I did. I explained to him everything. After a day, things were back together. We decided to mend things back together. I mean we aren't officially dating but you know what I mean? You can sense that something's still going on? Yup, that's it. October came, he stole my first kiss. It was magical. All I could ever think about is that I love him. That everything revolves around him. Its like he's my world. He's my strength yet he is also my weakness. Everything in him is just perfect. The way he surprises me with kisses.. The way he brought Gatorade just for me (Gatorade is my favorite drink, i just love that shit lol)
It was perfect. Everything was perfect. There are even times when he makes silly jokes or I took glances at him in class and im like 'shit, I love this guy' I was soo inlove. It was just.. Perfect. I never been so happy in my life. Everytime I woke up he's all I ever think about. He's cute 'Good Morning's'.. It made me cry, thinking about all those happy memories.
When christmas break came, he told me that his wifi router got broken.. Me, being the understanding girl that I am, understands him. I told him it was okay that he shouldn't worry about me.

(We talk and chat in Kik. We can't text since my mom checks my phone all the time)

One time, back at christmas break.. I was looking at my chat box in facebook but Something totally made me stop in my tracks. He was online. And he was usinh he's phone. I messaged him, i did everything but noo, he wouldn't reply anymore.. I don't know why. Christmas eve came, I kept on looking at my phone hoping that maybe he'd greet me a merry christmas but no, nothing came. It broke my heart. But one thing crossed my mind. I was like 'oh maybe he's wifi router is still destroyed'

New year came, I was waiting. Waiting for him to atleast greet me but no, nothing still came. It hurt me. It Crushed me .. to millions of pieces. But there's one thing that made me ball my eyes out.. He's close friend messaged me in facebook. He's like;

Happy new year __ ! How are you and him? I hope that this year is going to be a big blast for both of you. Best wishes. Haha don't forget im one of your #1 Fans of LYN! hahaha cx

That totally made me cry. I mean out of everything why that? Why his friend.? Its really heartbreaking to know that he's friend greeted me, while him? No. There was no effort. It crushed me. The way his friend says he want us to be good this year. It break me.

School came along, i tried not to approch him. Waiting for him to atleast apologize or say Hi, or ask me how my christmas break went but nothing. He never did. It crushed me. The next day, I tried talking to him but he was distant like he really is. He's bestfriend approached me and told me he wanted to talk. I listened. He's bestfriend told me the truth. He met a girl back at christmas break. He went to the movies with her and ate in a restaurant. It killed me. I was paralyzed in my seat. My breathing hitched. My face paled. My mind went blank. I felt like crying but my tears wouldn't fall. My eyes feel numb. My skin is on fire. I feel like someone just throwed me a bucket of lava. Just like that. It crushed me. I've lost weight. Im not the happy girl like before. Every recess or lunch, I don't mingle with my friends anymore. I just stay in the classroom, facing the wall, got my phone out and stay there till' its over. It crushed me. I'm not the bubble person that I am before. But you know what hurt me the most? He acted as if I never exist. It was like I was invinsible. That he couldn't see me. Just like that. There are times that I break down in class. I just couldn't help it. He looks soo happy without me. Huge smile in his face. And well, I also think that he has a crush on this girl.. He craves for her attention. He sits with her all the time in class. He talk about her all the time. I don't know what to do. Its killing me since we are classmates. I could see him everyday. Its hard to ignore him. It really is. It broke my heart. he is the love of my life. He's my everything. He's the only reason why I smile. Its hard. I mean he is after all my first love. My first ever boyfriend. My first kiss. It hurt me to know that another that I love, would leave me again. Like my dad. He left me. I mean sure, I got to see him and everything but it isn't like before. My dad has another daugther who is my half sister. My dad loves her so much. He wouldn't even bother to talk to me anymore. He wouldn't crave for our communication. When me and my dad's girlfriend fight, he always take her side. It kills me. Another guy who I love would leave me again. Wow, What did I do to deserve this? It kills me. Its almost a month now but im still not over him. He's all I could ever think about. I don't know what to do. I want the real me to be back again, but it wouldn't. Its hard to smile. He looks soo soo happy without me. It break me into millions of pieces. It made me realize that love is shitload of bullshit. I honestly don't believe in love anymore. I mean why? No matter how loving or caring that person is to you, they will break you in the end. Those people out there that are experiencing heartbreak, don't worry. Your not the only one. Im trying my hardest to stay strong. Let's just believe in ourself, have faith in God. And never say never