Searching for "loss"


13 Results For 'loss'

Leann

June 28, 2017 @ (United States)

Tags: Hurtful breakup


I met this guy on a site called meetme.com. we talked for about two weeks before meeting. We hit it off and began seeing eachother. Well about 3 weeks ago (early June 2017) we go on a long road trip and he brings up that he not only wants us to keep saying but he wants us to be exclusive. This made me very happy. I was shocked by this because most times it's the girl that brings this stuff up. So after we became exclusive, I noticed that he didn't want me around that much. He kept saying he was meeting his "buddies to hang out. Well on a Saturday, he asked me to come over after I got off work. I went over and we snuggled up in bed and talked for a while. I went to get me a drink at the gas station and got him an energy drink. I return, not gone 30 min, and he says his boss came by and wants him to go help him with some stuff. He then says he has plans to go see a "buddy in kansas. I was upset that I couldn't spend time with him. He told me I could stay at his place and help myself to what ever. He leaves. He texts me while he's gone asking how I'm doing and such. Then around 6p he texts me and says "you need to leave. My landlady is coming by." I told him I would stay to let her in. He says nothing. I knew in my guy what was up. So I put his dog in the kennel and leave. I let him know I'm gone and his all sweet to me about it. He promises to come by my place later. Of course he doesn't because a "buddy" needs a place to stay because his power went out. He calls me and talks all sweet. I still knew in my gut... the next day I get up and drive by his place...there was the car of another female. I go home, highly upset and text him about how he made me feel knowing he was cheating and why would he bother telling me he wants to be exclusive when he had no intention to do it himself. He never said a word. I've logged into the site I've met him at and he's still logging on. I guess it's true, leopard never changes his spots. He did all of this knowing I was still mourning the loss of my mom, who passed in January. I talked to him about her and everythng. And he still chose to hurt me like this.


       

A Red Head

March 31, 2017 @ (Canada)

Tags: A ginger Sob story


As long as I can remember I belive my personality said more about myself rather than my appearance.  Growing up what ever style it was, weather "grundge", "punk" or "gangster" my only real feature that stood out was my red hair. Though I wouldn't alow these styles to define me as a person I often felt predgism. This feeling often played a part in choices and morality as I grew up to never judge a book by its cover, and try to veiw things logic ly from Nemours perspectives. This led me to having a lot of friends from very diferent walks of life. This is the story of my last relationship spanning three years, from the time I met and fell in love with her at first sight, to my life right now, falling apart and absoltly hating myself. I am an asshole.

For some time, at the age of 23, I had been struggling with my housing situation. I was a first year heavy duity mechanic with two years experiance working maintenance for a pretty large transportation company in an oil city. Growing up here my entire life had given me at a young age a veiw into the world of drugs, gluttony, and a lot of narrow minded people just trying to stay busy and get by. During this time, the geting by was alright. The economy was booming and at this time were you to leave your job three more opertunity opened up. The realy problem at this point where the housing situation made it dificult was juggling my job and dealing with a series of drug addicted roomates. One of witch during the 2012 incident was telling me how he was goig to eat me. After that moved in with a friend growing up from high schools familie. Let's just say there was a series of murders going on with a particular gang that growing up i was affiliated through.  That was a unsafe fucked up situation I don't wish to discuss to much about Friends dieing and going to jail. This made me become more distant from more and more friends and focusing on my career.
Eventually, after some time couch serfing and sleepig in my car I had moved in with a two co workers. It was a old and small house, but it was nice. It was me and a coworker up stairs. My room was pink. Another country worker and his lesbian cousin and her other down stairs. With all that said, this is the setting of my tale. Where I first met her.
My roomate had started going through a dark period after his girlfriend had left him because he relapsed on meth. His down ward spiral kept geting worce and worce. Living with a meth head is the most unpleasant living I had delt with. Money, belonging, go missing, weird people come over. Mood swings. To cope with it I had began drinking more. Eventually he had lost his job and there was little I wouldn't do to get out of the house and meet new people. After one night at the bar I get back home fairly early. Being drunk and hearing music from un known origin I begin to follow it into the basement.  My down stairs roomates were having a few drinks and the girl I was in love with is there.
My first words to her were, " Oh your friends with those two? Are you a lesbian as well, because I think your cute."
She wasn't a lesbian. She was queer. Not that I realy understood much of that at the time. We ended up making out and I drove her to work the next day. I latter find out she had recently decided to transition into a man and begin her hormones. I was pretty sad that this girl who I just met that I already had feelings for was undergoing a change that wouldnt lead anywhere for us.
Regardless of where we both stood about my feeling we began hanging out. And for a time, a beautifle friendship blossomed. She inspired me to be myself, not let others take advantage of me, to stick up for myself have faith in making the right choices to better myself. I soon moved out of the house and got a small town house with my best friend growing up. For a time things seemed pretty good. How ever, I knew this girl I was already in love with and knew things how they were wouldn't last forever... nothing good lasts for ever, and once again things would get rocky. this is the end of part one.


       

Little Blue Turtle

August 17, 2016 @ (Texas)

Tags: Bad breakup, Jerk, Easy girl at party, his loss


Soo I met this guy and he seemed perfect. I had been on 5 or 6 super sucky dates before him, so when he came along all charming, I said ok let's keep dating. Long story short, he has a record. I accepted it because I liked him so much. We spent so much time together, we were official after 3 days and we talked about everything and anything. I let my walls down. I feel for him completley. Months pass by and I was with him through it all, the court stuff, sentencing, jail time. I visited him in jail spent time with his family, the whole nine yards. When he came out things were back to normal. We talked about our future and everything. 3 weeks ago my roommate and I had a liitle "house warming" new apartment. She invited a coworker, I invited my boyfriend of course, and all our other friends. 2 weeks ago he dumps me, saying that I call/text too much. I am obviously devestaded. I was working on moving on, then a few days ago that stupid coworker my friend invited to our party tells her that she and my boyfriend exchanged numbers the night of the party. He called that bitch up after he dumped me and took her on a date only a week after he ended things. I am heartbroken. I have never felt this low in my life. I did not deserve this and he and her are such punks for what they did. She's an idiot for going on a date with him and he's an asshole for calling her up. We just talked today and I told him everything of how the stuff he did was so messed up. Why talk about the future if you are going to dump me? Why call that dumb girl up a week after we ended things, if you supposedly cared about me? After everything we had been through together. It is just so messed up. This one will be tough to get over, but I have to, he is just not worth it. Moral of the story, bitches are shady, and there are wolves in sheep's clothing.


       

Nate

August 03, 2015 @ (europe)

Tags: Bad break up


Once upon a time I was dating a girl for a few months, I was in love with her and was really enjoying it. We had our ups and down , on the last month though we were doing pretty well. until the summer break came , so we were going to spend about a month apart, in our hometowns. A few days after she left she started to show some kind of unconcern about me, and phone calls reduced. the duration of phone calls also reduced. I understood that things were going bad, even I was complained some times to her .But I believed that it was just the distance, or that I was overreacting and overthinking it. I was very sad, angry and unsecure at that time but I tried not to show it, most of the times, not to make things worse and I just waited to get back together to see what is actually going on. But the last few days before we return to the city we were studying, she started to talk to me really cold on the phone without any obvious reason. So I decided not to talk to her again and see how far this apathy and unconcern goes. So one day we closed the phone, and didn't call her again. Neither did she. She detached and then she got lost, just like that... So I decided after a few days to call her, as I knew she had already arived, and I asked her to meet and talked,she agreed but she said she was very busy with going out with friends and she told me me that she wasn't sure about when we are going to meet. This was very offensive, I felt very bad that it was so hard for her to find 20 minutes to discuss with me the problem..just because she was going out a lot with friends. I was sure then that we were breaking up, So the next day I just sent her a text and I said her that we were breaking up, with the hope that if it was important for her to be together, she would try a just a bit. But she replied and said that she also wanted to break up. My heart teared apart at that time. Something that once was good, ended with a 2-lines text and a goodbye. I am very sad about it, some day I will feel better I suppose, but today is not that day.

I talk to people about it and most of them act like it's nothing, and respond to me with stuff like you will find another one etc. At first I was feeling but about being so hurt, but a loss like this causes pain , and it feels better now that I accepted that pain is just normal in cases like this and eventually it will pass, but not today.


       

Unbelievable

January 10, 2015 @ (toronto, ontario)

Tags: bad breakup, hurt, unbelievable, played, sad


I have loved him for more than 5 years. We've had a thing for almost a year but that never blossomed into a real relationship until a year and a half ago. During that year of us having a 'thing', I couldn't stop thinking about him- he was my first thought every morning and every night. Everything about him I loved, his flaws, his personality. He was someone who inspired me to become a better person, someone who made me become a better person ever since we met. I was stupid to wait around. That year of our 'thing', he ended up telling me that his feelings for me weren't as strong anymore and that I should go off and 'explore a bit' with other guys. Out of anger, out of hurt, I did. My friend chased me. And I decided to give him a chance.

It wasn't long before he came back. Grovelling, crying, begging. He tore me away from my relationship with my friend. And I was stupid enough to have believed he wanted me for real this time. He was romantic and even wanted to be my 'official' boyfriend this time- and he is not the type of person to ever label things without thinking things through. So broke my friend's heart, and ran off with this guy. Everything was great.. until it wasn't. He rarely texts, rarely makes time to see me. He would be so involved with his work, and his gym life. He would spend his actual birthday with his guy friends instead of me. He doesn't feel the want to see me. He got me way too easily. He was so sweet in the beginning I couldn't believe it. I knew it was too good to be true.

On december 27, 2014, he told me he was going to make a big move in his career. When I told him about my point of view, how I was willing to support him and follow him, he told me to really think about it. He didn't want me to go.

5 days later, on new year's day, he broke up with me, saying after the past 3 days of thinking he decided it was best for us to break up. After investing so much in this he decided, after 3 days, to break up. He crushed me. For the second time in my life, by the same person and for the same reasons. He couldn't feel anything with me anymore. He just fell out of love. And after a year and a half, told me his family and my family would never work out together.

I am beyond sad. My heart feels like there's a gigantic canyon on it, in it. Depression is real. This is real.


       

Steven G

July 11, 2014 @ (Yonkers, NY)

Tags: love, loss, bad break up, cheating, relationship


I have yet to go wrong on a “gut feeling” when it comes to a disaster with a significant other. I somehow can sense the bomb going off but never in time to defuse it. The most recent example was by a lovely lady I was seeing for several months. She and I did not land on solid ground due to the conditions of our start. We shared many laughs, cries, and plenty about each other during that time. I was hesitant at first about her feelings at first, not knowing if they were true or just brought up by the circumstances of her previous relationship. We shared a wild, strong sexual appetite during the first half of our relationship. Facing personal dilemmas and financial difficulties; she pursued a second job in which she could balance herself with. She quickly got an offer to work a gentlemen’s club as a coat checker. I saw the potential for disaster, keeping in mind her personality, state of mind, and lack of experience with the world. I feared that I might lose her in the process to some money throwing pig. Yet I needed to keep my personal fears in check and support who I regarded as my babe with anything she set her mind to. If this one thing could break us, than all my suspicions would be true; if they don’t than we could move forward, take the leap into going public with our relationship.

Several weeks later we began to drift apart, we would ignore mutual calls and text. We did not see each other for days at a time. I began to worry about us, and so I began to call her more often, asking how she was and brought up ideas on trips we could take. It had little to no affect, as her eyes and perhaps even her heart were set on someone else whom she met at the gentlemen’s club. One evening we got into an argument; and just like that, she asked me never to speak to her again; without any hesitation on my part, I hung up. The next day I told her we needed to talk; it was important that we clear the air. No response ever came that day, or the next day, or the day after. I tried once more and she quickly delivers the blow “I need time” which we all know to be “break-up mode”. I tried and tried again to see her so we could talk, all while sensing the inevitable blow that was soon to come. I would go to her apartment late at night, and she and her truck wouldn’t be there. I knew that I had lost her at this point; or maybe just 99%. I took a chance and went to her one last time; even after she told me not to. I gave her everything that she ever wanted, with a promise to be there always. She wasn’t giving in, she could not see being with me being better than the guy that she met recently. I knew that my words were barely chipping away at her wall. She was cold all throughout this and yet at the end she hugged me and showed me signs of remorse or sympathy. Before she walked back in I asked her, if in this last moment, we could turn things around and try to work this out with a clean slate. Her lips said no, but in her eyes, I saw a glimmer of yes. Despite what I felt, she gave me the closure I had asked her for. I wished her the best, and reminded her that I would always have her in my heart. Got in my car, and I had the most difficult drive of my life.


       

WhyohWhy

October 01, 2013 @ (New York)

Tags: Bad breakups


After almost 9 years, a child and a house I thought we were set for a happy ever after.

We were planning more babies, looking to upgrade the house. But then one night he just never came home. He said he was alone, needed time alone to grieve the loss of his father. Said he wanted no one else. He quit his job and I supported him. I honestly thought he just wanted
Time alone. But once his inheritance cleared he stopped talking to me. And then the discovery of a love filled card from another women clarified the actual situation!!

He said she was great. A really good girl - aren't all mistresses great people!!! Hahaha. She was the one. Who knows how long they were seeing each other but that was that.

He moved in with her, took our son and introduced her and her kids as part of his new family.

All a bit quick? If only I knew he was cheating . . . If only he told
Me the truth instead of lying and lying. He was staying with me only until his inheritance was in his account. The other woman and him planned a new life together. He said he didn't tell me because he wasn't sure if they would work out! Hahahaha I was the back up plan!! Oh And he didn't want to hurt me! Brilliant.

Nothing as shocking, devastating and soul destroying like it. On the bright side, at least I'm no longer with a lying, cheating, unemployed, delusional moron!!


       

Yana

April 17, 2013 @ (California)

Tags: long distance


We met through a mutual friend who was very close to both of us. Before meeting, the mutual friend actually told my ex that we were "perfect for each other".
The first few times we hung out, always in a group of friends, I thought he was cocky and full of it, but I was intensely attracted to him. One night at a party, I noticed he was kind of following me around. Every where I was in the house, he was too. He was adorable and shy, and I was forced to re-examine my first impression of him. We ended up talking for hours alone that night and we somehow intuitively knew so much about each other despite having been acquainted for such a short time. It was one of those magical moments in life when two human beings who are basically strangers really "see" each other, and love what they see.
We fell in love very quickly and intensely over the next few weeks. Time was always running away from us; he was supposed to leave the state in just a few months.
A year of long distance bullshit later, he stopped responding to me. Said he needed to have some time to himself, to figure things out. A week later he broke up with me. The reasons were never really clear but I think mostly he needed his independence to carve out his own place in the world, and he didn't feel he could do that with the pressures of our relationship. He said we were like two kids caught up in a fairy tale, and he had been hit with reality. Our fairy tale was the most important thing to me. We shared dreams of building a treehouse and living there in the wilderness with our kids and dogs and little vegetable patch. We called each other soulmates and "love of my life". I believed in it with everything I had. For me, this was my partner in life.
I was in a state of physical and emotional shock for some time after the break up. We vowed to remain close, to remain best of friends, because we both believed that love never really dies - even when two people part ways. Six months later he told me again I was his soulmate. Three days later he started to ignore me, which he has continued to do since (4 months and counting). This has truly been the most painful part of the whole experience. I believed so completely that this person, regardless of the current status of our relations, would always support and love and acknowledge me . By ignoring me, he has made me feel invisible, worthless, and crazy. Sometimes I think I made everything up in my head or that it was some crazy dream. More than I grieve for a lost lover, I grieve for the loss of a genuine connection with a person, the kind which is very rare in our world.


       

DT

February 19, 2013 @ (Bulgaria)

Tags: break up


Hey guys :) i've read some of your stories and i guess mine isn't as tragic but it still hurts... It all started the day after a friend's party me and 3 guys were kicked out of the house at about 8 in the morning and we decided we were hungry. So we went to Dunkin'Donuts. There we started talking and i realized how much in common we had with K[my ex]. After that we hadn't paid much attention to eachother but we started chatting on facebook. We got closser and closser with every single day we always chatted and when we weren't near a computer we texted. So on march 28th 2012 we started dating ^^ Everything was perfect we were always together we had mutual friends and everything was perfect... i was so HAPPY :)... i even gave my virginity to him ... But then things got bad... we started seeing eachother less and less... he stopped calling me or whatever... if i didn't write to him or call him he never would... he prefered to go to his pottheaded friends then be with me :). So the first time i hadn't heard from him for a week i told him that i want attention i know he's been on the computer i've seen his facebook posts FOR GODS SAKE! And he just looked with those puppy eyes said he was sorry and everything was right again :)... but no.. it happened again... and again... On the third time i asked him how would he feel in my place? What would he do? Did he know that i felt like i was there just so if someone asked him if he had a girlfriend he'd say yes? He just stayed silent... After that day ended i went home and i was expecting atleast a phonecall from him to bring me back.... Nope! Not even a message... So i wrote: after everything we've been trough i didn't even get one message... he called me. The same thing happened i talked he stayed silent... we said we'd meet... We did the samme thing and after the hundret time of me asking him what should i do and how does he think i feel he said i hope we stay friends.... The sad thing is 4 months after the break up i already have a new boyfriend that does EVERYTHING for me and treats me like a princess and i still can't get HIM out of my mind... and what hurts even more is that he doesn't give crap about me :) So i'm forced to see him everyday at school and act happy and fake...


       

Bob David

May 03, 2012 @ (san diego)

Tags: Acceptance


We met when I was 21 and she was just turning 18, a little over 5 years ago. There was instant attraction and our relationship advanced quickly. I knew deep down that neither of us were mature enough to be in a long term committed relationship, but we stuck together anyways. There were a lot of good times, fun memories, amazing sex and we were always there for eachother through the ups and downs. About two years into the relationship there were multiple infadelities-- she started sleeping with one of my good friends behind my back and I had slept around with more than 1 girl. Despite this huge blow to our trust and relationship, we stuck together after we came clean with each other on what we had done. In hindsight I know that we stuck together because we were attached and had some form of needyness with each other. I feel weak to admit that, but I honestly just felt attached and couldn't let her go despite the fact that we had both hurt each other severely and that we deserved better. I knew in my heart at the time that I should have let her go, but my impulsive needyness forced me to hold on to a relationship that had become toxic. Since then we tried to rebuild the foundation of trust in our relationship, but we were fighting an uphill battle and there was just too much insecurity and distrust towards eachother. A year and a half ago we moved in together, which was a big mistake. Things were ok on the surface, but deep down we both felt disconnected and unhappy with the relationship. Along the way we became very short tempered and irritated with eachother. She would yell and call me names, I would yell back and say hurtful things-- stuff you just don't do when you say that you love someone. I knew in my heart for a long time it was not right and that I needed to let go, but I just didn't have the courage to part company with her. I feel ashamed for having held on to something that I knew was not right for me. We broke up about 5 weeks ago after she did not come home one night. She told me she went out to party with her friends and stayed with a female co-worker, but my intuition told me otherwise. We both agreed that we were not right together and both needed to stand on our own two feet. We were together for 5 and a half years and although I know that it was not the right relationship for me I still feel a deep sense of loss an emotional pain. Despite having hurt eachother I had considered her my best friend-- we did everything together and wanted desperately to make things work. I have been trying so hard for the last 5 weeks to look at the reality of the relationship, but my mind keeps wanting to tell me that we could have made it work or that I should have been a better man. The fact is I was immature and acted with the level of maturity and awareness that I had at the time-- I think it's fair to say that she did too. I keep beating myself up over what I could have done differently and all the what if's, but it has only held me back from letting go and moving on. I am trying so hard to accept that it's over, but still find myself hoping for reconciliation in the future-- hope that is eating me up inside. I know that we both deserve better and that it cannot work. I am not one to share my personal story on an online forum such as this, but I started reading a book the other day that suggested I post about the breakup on this website. It has been helpful typing this story up and putting things into perspective. I think it's important that I look at my past relationship logically rather than feed off of my emotions. Anyways, I know my story probably sounds crazy or like I am a bad guy for having cheated, but I would appreciate any feedback. I am now 26 and have come to so many realizations in reflecting on the relationship. I really want to better myself and become the best man that I can be not only for myself, but so that I can have a healthy, loving relationship in the future. Most importantly I want to love myself so I never put myself in a toxic relationship again where I think that I don't deserve better. Anyways, stay strong to everyone that is going through similar heart break or emotional pain. Everyone keeps telling me it will pass-- I just hope that it does sooner than later!