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Broken (part 4)

April 21, 2015 @ (toronto)

Tags: bad breakup


Three weeks into my still ongoing vacation i get a call from a friend. Says he wasn't in paris with his friends for new years but with his so called ex-wife who is not an ex wife and never was. I feel a flutter of wrongs come back into my stomach. I feel a volcano of emotions. But most of all i feel like puking I puke out everything, the lies, the emotions, the hurt, the champagne, the empty promises, the real promises? I don't know at this point but i keep puking and then i cry. I cry for the lies he has told me and i cry for the two hearts i broke because of him. I cry for the man i let go and i cry for the mistake i have made. I cry for lying to myself and ignoring all the red signs, i cry for believing him, and mostly i cry because i can't and won't let him go. I call him i break up with him. He doesn't run after me and won't run after me. I block him and then unblock him i do this for the next 3 months. once i unblock him i hurl insults at him through Facebook, text messaging, voice messaging. I feel empty so i block him again. I do it again and this time we go back to saying i love yous but then the anger rises in me and i hurl my insult my pain at a screen. So i block him again. I unblock him and so it begins a cycle. I laugh sometimes. My friends stare at me. They used to call me the ice queen now i am the melting queen. I have break downs and melt downs. I can't hurl my anger at him so i hurl it at them whenever they'r ehappy i do it when they're down i do it when they're sad i do it. I don't know myself. The last time i blocked him was 7 days ago today i say its done its over. But deep down i don't know if it is. I love him as a child loves its favourite blanket or as mother loves her unborn child. I love him as if he were the beat of my heart and soul. I feel a physical pain when i see a flash of his smile in my head. I miss him so much that its physically painful to breath. I tell myself it is better to have loved and lost then to have felt no love at all. Then i google and try to find who said that quote and i then i want to find them and murder them. I want to see if they really have loved and lost because anyone who has truly loved. As in loved with their entire soul and finally understood what i would die for you would never ever ever say such a fucking stupid quote. So i go online and i try to find sad break up stories. I find this website but all the stories are about 18 year olds whom portably thing they have found true love. And i think to myself they are only 18 and they don't know what love means. But then i look at myself and i remember i was 18 and i knew love and look where that love has brought me. Which really is nowhere.


       

Layla

April 19, 2015 @ (LA)

Tags: Bad break up


So, I had this boyfriend in high school. He met me through social media and he went to my school but I've never seen him around. He messaged me and he was messaging a bunch of other girls that he was also interested in. But when we were texting, he didn't reply for a week. And I had an awful gut feeling about him, idk why. But I was a fool for not listening to it. Anyways, after that week, he finally messaged me and he continued for a while. Then he asked me out on a date. Boy was I excited. My first date. We went to the movies and he bought my ticket already. It was sweet. Then after a month he asked me to be his girlfriend. I said yes and things were well. The problem was, he lied to me about everything. Which caused me to always be sad. He would still follow girls that he used to have feelings for. I politely asked a bunch of times and gave him hints it bothered me. And he knew it. I mean, I appreciated all the dates and flowers. We were together for 7 months. I gave him me. He gave me him. We were in love. But little did I know, he wasn't. It was hard dating someone who would stare at girls for 15 minutes when you would go on dates. I wished he looked at me the way he looked at them. And of course I wasn't perfect, but I did EVERYTHING for him. All I wanted was to make him smile. At the end of the relationship, he followed back 7 girls and I was furious. I was at practice and saw and I just almost clasped. I knew things were going down hill. Then the day of the break up he comes to my house and he claims to be a gentleman he honked at me to come outside. Then he brings me to a park and writes a list of things that he thought was wrong with me. Example on the list "playing games" I asked for 1 thing, stop following girls he used to like and stop lying to me. I knew he was lying about everything. And 1 girl I knew he really liked. Which was hard. So anyways, he told me I was immature and I'm always sad. I'm always sad because my boyfriend wants other girls. But truthfully it wasn't worth it to fight about it. So I just said he was right. And he asked me to prom then he just ripped it away from me. First he said "I want you to still think if you wanna go to prom with me" then to " I need time to think" then to "I can't do this anymore" he is a compulsive liar. And seeing him follow girls and not respecting my wishes hurt. Because I cared more than anything for this guy. I just wanted to make him smile. I would leave little treats in his locker and write him notes. But I was too nice, and he was really cocky. Like one time he told me "appreantly the whole cheerleading team likes me" and he just was rude. The way he ended the relationship was not what a true gentleman would do. Which he claims to be. I don't care how many flowers you get me, if you lie and constantly want other girls, and don't respect my wishes. You shouldn't be here. Then, 2 days after we broke up, he was already talking to a girl. Seeing prom pics was hard but I'm getting over the whole situation and I'm a better person because of it. Karma is a bitch, and it will hit him. Because I wasn't the prettiest or the smartest, but I swear I loved him more than any girl would ever. So ya, just know loves things get better.❤️😊


       

Sara

April 17, 2015 @ (Canada)

Tags: bad breakup


My boyfriend broke up with me about a month ago, everything was going so great, I never felt this happy before, he made me feel like a princess and I know that he truly cared. We have been together for a year and a half, we have had problems, but nothing really major, it was often the same problems again and again, but I thought that we had so much more good times than bad ones and from my point of view, the relationship was going just fine. Well, aparently not, he did not told me a specific reason for the breakup, he just told me that he felt their was a distance between us now, that it was not like it used to be, that we loved less that he did. And i was just so confused, I did not get it and none of my friends or family members neither. They just could not understand, just like me. My friends and family loved him. We promised that we will be friends, but soon realised that we needed some time off first. So we tried to stop talking to each others, but we failed, it's been a month and we talk at least once a week. He tells that he misses me all the time and I miss him so much too, I can't stop thinking about him. And I know that if we ever get back together, we could make this work. I asked him to take and break, he said he did not want to, I asked him if we took some time off and try this again in a few months, we frist said ok, but then said no,that he did not want me in his life anymore, yet he tells that he misses me... I just do not get and I am so confused. I am juste sitting there, hoping he will come at my door tomorrow and ask me to get back together, knowing it will never happen. Never knew something could hurt so much.


       

Ryan

April 16, 2015 @ (United States)

Tags: Bad Breakup


Exactly a year ago I met someone special, the moment I set my eyes on her I knew she was something of one of a kind, I was a typical high school student and she was as well. It took me a month before I worked the courage to speak to her and my gut was right, she was the most beautiful person I have ever met. She was weird and quirky and funny and stupidly silly. The school year ended and thats when it started to get serious. We spent our summer together and did many things, she taught me how to swim(because I never trusted anyone around water due to my hydrophobia) and we went on vacation together(her parents payed for my trip lol) It was honestly one of the happiest times of my life. We barely fought and if we did we made up each time like it was nothing and moved on with our days. I grew blinded by my affection soon after, I loved this girl and I was terrified to admit it. Soon after the next school year started, I could feel the distance happening. Which caused me to become jealous, scared, etc I was panicking and didn't know what to do. I could see it coming and it did. She broke up with me, telling me she didn't want a relationship right now blah blah blah. I crashed and burned, I was so devastated that I just wanted to hurt myself(of course I didn't) she then led me on for a few months, would kiss me, try and comfort me when I was down, she even came over to my house and slept with me, but in the end she would always use that excuse and it pushed me even further down... causing me to push her even further away without realizing it... Ever sense then I've just been realizing what I did wrong and been bettering myself, dating new people most guys would say my life has been pretty great for some of the girls that are chasing me.. but all I can continue to think about is her. The one that got away. That all I can do is pray because I knew her reason of leaving me was complete crap, especially since she's with someone else now. I just wish her the best while I sit and wish I had the best. She's still deep in my heart and I see people hating on their ex and everything, but even though she did me wrong I can't help but wish she has the best for her. I just know that if I was with her now, things would have been much different and she'd still be mine, but that's my new found confidence that I will hope to be able to use with someone of the same or better amount to offer... I've learned a lot and even though I still am upset about her, maybe we're better off. Or maybe it was the bad timing, I'm now 18 and i'm still young. Life ahead of me is something to shine about.


       

AZ

April 11, 2015 @ (United States)

Tags: first Love, First break up, second chance, back together


My story might be a little different, but still the same feelings, the same pain. I am a guy and i fell in love with another guy this was my first relationship with a guy. We met in March of 2014 everything was great from day one. We met at a parking lot at the willowbrook mall in Houston, TX. We were great together, we wouldn't go 24hrs without texting each other. He told me from the begining he was scared of getting hurt and wanted to take everything slow, he said he had moved too fast before and only ended up getting hurt. He didnt want to make the same mistake this time. We never became an official couple, but we were officially dating. He told me what he was feeling was getting stronger and it was freaking him and he didnt want to lose me. We went on a few road trips, Marfa, TX Austin, San Antonio it was great. We used to see each other a few times per week almost a year later we started seeing each other less and less, he put this big distance between us i didnt know why and it was killing me. In October I decided to ask him to take it to the next step, he straight out said no, he didnt want to get hurt or move to fast. I told him i would wait for him. We kept hanging out, things were ok I was already in love, but i was also scared. so in March i finally decided to put the fear aside and tell him i fell in love with him and that i love him so at least he knew how i feel, i didnt want to pressure him. When i told him he probably freaked out, he was more quite than usual. I started feeling sad, i didnt want to lose him. I told him to tell me if he wasnt interested anymore or didnt want to continue dating. He said he was just figuring out himself. On March 18th saw him again and it was the last time i saw him, i texted him he didnt reply at that moment i thought he was ignoring me, avoiding me, he texted me back he said he wasnt. I felt he didnt want to talk to me or hang out anymore it was killing me i didnt know if i did anything wrong, he told me there was not a thing wrong with me that it was all him and he wasnt ready. i told him i had faith we will end up together i had hope he would shop up at my door and tell me he wanted to give it a chance. He said maybe someday, he wasnt ready yet, but he wasnt going to disappear or quit talking to me. That was his last text. He completely ignored me, I didnt know why, i didnt know what happened or what i did wrong. I still havent gotten a text from him. I did everything i could to be together. This is the first time I was in a relationship with a guy, I never thought i could love someone, i never thought i could love a guy this much. I accepted all these feelings, I was ready to tell my family if i had to. Its almost two weeks since he ignored me, his silence is killing me, he didnt give me the gift of closure. I dont know what hurts more to feel that i lost him, to have accepted all these emotions or to be ignored and i dont know why or what happened or if i didnt anything wrong. This is the first time i feel this, the first time i suffer for someone. This is the first time i love someone and it was a guy. And the worse thing is that i still have hope that he will show up at my door, i hope he is just figuring out himself to finally be ready and start something with me. He will be ready someday, he will give someone a chance, i wish that someone was me, i wish it was me the one to make him happy. I love him, he will always be my white guy, the one who brought light into my life.


       

Jack

April 06, 2015 @ (Australia)

Tags: Bad Breakup, Cruel, Cheating


10 days from our 2 year anniversary and there she in another guys bed.

2 years ago we had met at a party things were great we connected really well after about 3 months into our friendship we decided to give it a go. She was my first love and i thought it would be my only love.
Everything was going so well except for the usual fights here and there which i always knew was normal until she got to college she wouldn't text me or call me as much anymore and she always cancelled the last minute for her friends at college. in the last weeks of our relationship I knew deep down she was different. Then one day she called me and said i think we should stop seeing each other i told her i would see her that afternoon. i thought about it all day what i would say to change her mind but i realized that i have to respect her decision as she must have a reason to it that afternoon is exactly what i did. NOT EVEN 24 hours later she text's me saying i've just made the worst decision of my life i had been crying non stop. she had no idea how hurt i was. I got back with her then realized i never really knew why she wanted to break up in the first place so me being me i went to her dorm unexpected at 6am to find her not there then go to this guys dorm bed i knew she was texting and find her in his bed.. Love is too cruel to me


       

Lynn

March 23, 2015 @ (Amsterdam)

Tags: Bad breakup hurt pain


For those that read my story they already know how hard my breakup was. To make it even worse my ex texted me, to rub in my fase how happy he is with his new girl. He mentioned he didn't regret cheating and it made him happier. That his new girl is more beautiful and atractive she is because she is thick. I was torn and broken. Anyway my long lost crush texted me I'm over the moon. Hope my midget ex is enjoying his life.


       

Kyle

March 16, 2015 @ (Canada)

Tags: breakup


I'm just going to put it like this, been with my girlfriend for 7 months, she started showing less affection and decided not to care about me anymore or try. Told her to get it over with and break up with me already if she wanted to, so she did. Little hurt, not as much as I should be considering I expected it for awhile now and told her lots of time before to do it already, so I held in my feelings and made sure I lost them for her.


       

Poet

March 14, 2015 @ (from hell)

Tags: sad break up, bad break up, love


"The last chapter of our story" or "the brake up" is my best way to tell you how! Let me know what you think

Why did you go and left me alone
Did you think like I'll just move on?

Your memory is in every corner of my mind
Without seeing you, my eyes will go blind

Do you remember when we planed everthing together ?
And you said "baby, I'll be with you forever"

I believed your word like it was an oath
Because of it, now I feel loath

We had a bond stronger than bricks
After all these years, you say we don't really mix!

My problem is, I'm in love with your smile
To get over it, it'll take me a while

There is apart of me will never forget you
I'll always love you, regardless what you do

And when you realize how much I do, it'll be too late
You'll crawl back to me, but I won't take that bait

I wish you will always be happy, even though I'm hurt
Cuz once you love someone you just can't revert

That's how I love you, but you decided to forget everything we shared
It breaks my heart, but at least now I know how much you cared

That's how you wanted to write the last chapter of our story
Nothing will fix it now, not even "I'm sorry".


       

Brokenheart

March 14, 2015 @ (india)

Tags: bad break up.


I have been in a long distance relationship for a year now and my boyfriend has been acting really weird from the past two months. he has been desperately trying to end the relationship. the last time i met he seemed depressed and i thought its just the depression and the work pressure that has made him this way. we fight alot and he gets so upset that he ends up crying. we had a huge fight on my birthday which was a month back. Ever since then he seems to complaining of severe depression and that he hasnt been able to sleep and said he wanted some space. after two days he calls me and tells me that he is ending this relationship for good and that he hates me. he even said that he will be looking out for girls from april to get married too. I was shattered and i honestly didnt know what was going on. a week later he calls me again and says he was sorry and he cant live without me. I took him back but i was tooo hurt to heal so quickly and accept that he wanted me. it wasnt even three days when got into yet another fight. he then withdrew and stopped talking to me. i later get a call from his boss and his boss who is way older than us, said that its best i move on. I FEEL SO TORN APART . i dont even know why he did this to me. i dont know what is the actual reason for the break up. i loved him so much that in my mind we were already married. i saw him like my husband. why would a guy do this to me? i request him to meet me one last time in april when he comes here, but he bluntly refused. I REAALLY DONT KNOW WHY THIS HAPPeNED. i tried way to hard to make this work. something in me says he loves me. the other half tells me ive been only manipulated and kicked around like a football in and out of his life. I NEED SOME ADVICE.